Zack and I have brought you along this journey for almost a year - from the beginning of the discovery of our true selves, through our history - how we met, through our ups and downs, our delicious, wonderful romance. It has been wonderful - not only discovering ourselves but sharing that discovery with our readers.
But, although we would love to believe in "forever" - I'm afraid that "forever" does not exist, no matter how much we may want it. And that is particularly true of a couple in the situation Zack and I are in.
It is with an extremely heavy heart that I write now of watching the beginning of the end for us. Zack says I am over reacting - but I truly do not believe that is the case. The distance between us continues to widen. Zack refuses to discuss this with me, he does not have the courage to say the words I know hang in the air. It really isn't anyone's fault, there is no blame to be laid. It simply is what it is. He is like the little boy that believes if we don't see it, it isn't real, if we don't talk about it, it won't happen. He does not want to hurt people, he does not want to hurt me and he understands how much ending our relationship will hurt us both. So, I have made the decision to pull away. Kind of like Rose and Jack in Titanic - except it will be Zack on the raft and I will simply sink out of sight. Neither of us will have to break us up - we will just be gone in a puff of smoke.
Zack and Mistress Sarah will cease to be.
I will give up the apartment within the next couple of months as we go through this process. My heart is breaking right now, but I will make sure that Zack knows I will ALWAYS be here for him, I will AL:WAYS love him, and if he ever needs me I will ALWAYS come. In this, I must remain the strong one, the one who makes the decisions. It is my desire and my responsibility to make this as painless as I possibly can for Zack. I love that man so very much.
So, thank you, for your support, for your devotion to this blog. I am not going to take it down - I will keep you updated on our situation. I just truly hope that someday you will read that Zack and Mistress Sarah have found their way back to each other.
