In reference to zack's latest confession, I am wondering if our readers think his fears are justified.. If you have been reading this blog for sometime, you will have a sense of who I am and what I am like and I would love to hear your thoughts on the subject.. maybe you can give zack some advise. I don't mind that he is apprehensive, it is the not knowing that sends him deep into subspace - and I like him there.
We spent the evening together last night. I also have a confession - there is nothing I take greater delight in that fucking this slut - body and mind (and I am VERY good at fucking his mind!) all the while demanding that he not cum - I know the exact moment that I need to back off, but he knows how pissed I would be if he disobeyed me on this.. he is NOT TO CUM. Period. I may never let him cum again. I delighted in his responses last night as he was almost in tears and he chanted "i don't want to be in trouble, i don't want to be in trouble" then "oh my GOD, do you know what you are doing to me???" LOL. I knew exactly what I was doing to him.
So, zack needs to understand that I know exactly what I am doing, and I know exactly what he can handle and what he can't. He also needs to trust that i have no intentions of raping him. When I fuck his ass (and trust me I will) it will be him begging me to do it..
Thursday 7 March 2013
Wednesday 6 March 2013
Confession
I'm scared of Mistress fucking my ass. I know this is a deep desire of hers and has been for a very long time. As her loving submissive, I must give her my ass and I'm determined to do so this year.
But late at night, I want to make this confession. I'm scared.
Zack
But late at night, I want to make this confession. I'm scared.
Zack
Tuesday 5 March 2013
Mistress Sarah's escalation
Things seem to be escalating in our M/s relationship. Mistress Sarah went looking for a big black cock to fuck tonight. She found an excellent candidate and had me write a message of introduction on her behalf.
I must admit that I gasped when Mistress sent me a photograph of the man's torso. He was lean with a cock that stretched forever.
Mistress calls it a BBC...a beautiful black cock. I must admit that it was attractive. Mistress would look so good with this man. Just writing this makes my cock so hard.
I'm such a slut.
I liked how Mistress wrote to me later telling me that I was lucky I didn't fuck up. I need Mistress's stern side. She's so loving, but I want her to know how well I respond to her when she gets Bitchy.
As a submissive, I need this.
I know Mistress worries about me and how I will feel when she plays with another toy. I'm declaring here that I love Mistress. It gives me pleasure to know Mistress can take pleasure and be loved by me.
She's my Sovereign.
I must admit that I gasped when Mistress sent me a photograph of the man's torso. He was lean with a cock that stretched forever.
Mistress calls it a BBC...a beautiful black cock. I must admit that it was attractive. Mistress would look so good with this man. Just writing this makes my cock so hard.
I'm such a slut.
I liked how Mistress wrote to me later telling me that I was lucky I didn't fuck up. I need Mistress's stern side. She's so loving, but I want her to know how well I respond to her when she gets Bitchy.
As a submissive, I need this.
I know Mistress worries about me and how I will feel when she plays with another toy. I'm declaring here that I love Mistress. It gives me pleasure to know Mistress can take pleasure and be loved by me.
She's my Sovereign.
Just So We Are Clear...
zack has indicated that he thinks I have "grown" more into my role/persona as a Mistress.
That is true. I am here to ensure that he understands that I own him, he is MY slave, MY whore, MY slut and I don't give a damn if he approves of me fucking anyone else, let alone the elusive black man.
I think I might delight in binding him to a chair and forcing him to watch as I satisfy myself. Surely I can find a cock that is bigger than his to use, one that may satisfy me to an even greater degree than his does.
I might enjoy watching him squirm with uncertainty of his position at the same time as he squirms because he is so damned horny watching us - black and white melding together. Horny because he is a slut and probably craving the experience of sucking that cock when I am done with it, praying I will "force" him to, begging me to permit him that.
I would also delight in having him bathe me and dress me to go out on a date with this man while he sat in the apartment wondering what will happen to him when I get home.
I have such a whore on my hands.
That is true. I am here to ensure that he understands that I own him, he is MY slave, MY whore, MY slut and I don't give a damn if he approves of me fucking anyone else, let alone the elusive black man.
I think I might delight in binding him to a chair and forcing him to watch as I satisfy myself. Surely I can find a cock that is bigger than his to use, one that may satisfy me to an even greater degree than his does.
I might enjoy watching him squirm with uncertainty of his position at the same time as he squirms because he is so damned horny watching us - black and white melding together. Horny because he is a slut and probably craving the experience of sucking that cock when I am done with it, praying I will "force" him to, begging me to permit him that.
I would also delight in having him bathe me and dress me to go out on a date with this man while he sat in the apartment wondering what will happen to him when I get home.
I have such a whore on my hands.
Desires of a Mistress
I can tell from what Mistress desires from her last post.
She wants a big black cock. Probably for fucking. I've known this for a while. Sometimes, Mistress can be very transparent, even though it may take a little while for her to articulate it in such a blunt way.
She's very considerate.
I like the way Mistress wrote about it in the post below. She mentioned this as an act of consideration to her slave. Which it is.
But I also think Mistress wants this for herself. I'm here to tell her, as her slave, that she can take whatever she wants and I will love her and serve her. This is how I can be her best slave.
Even if Mistress wanted to be fucked by a large black cock belonging to a man who was not submissive, I would still serve Mistress.
I want Mistress to realize that she is free to do whatever she wants with me, her humble slave.
I love Mistress.
She wants a big black cock. Probably for fucking. I've known this for a while. Sometimes, Mistress can be very transparent, even though it may take a little while for her to articulate it in such a blunt way.
She's very considerate.
I like the way Mistress wrote about it in the post below. She mentioned this as an act of consideration to her slave. Which it is.
But I also think Mistress wants this for herself. I'm here to tell her, as her slave, that she can take whatever she wants and I will love her and serve her. This is how I can be her best slave.
Even if Mistress wanted to be fucked by a large black cock belonging to a man who was not submissive, I would still serve Mistress.
I want Mistress to realize that she is free to do whatever she wants with me, her humble slave.
I love Mistress.
Sunday 3 March 2013
Pleasure and Opportunity...
An M/s relationship is very interesting and after re-reading my last blog post I can see how someone might wonder "If Mistress Sarah is so devoted to her slave, how can she consider taking on another?"
This is a good question and one I have put to myself. My response to it is I can't - I can't consider taking on another slave, at least not at this point (I always say "never say never"). And yet, here I am exploring opportunities to acquire another 'toy" - preferably a very large black one. (just typing that sends a jolt of passion through my body). And not only acquiring one, but requiring zack to watch and listen while I play - knowing full well that it will turn him on, but will also cause him feelings of sadness, jealousy, helplessness.
But here is my rationale - by taking advantage of a 2nd toy (human, of course), I accomplish 2 things: I allow zack opportunities to prove his own devotion and commitment to me by sitting quietly as I fuck another (man or woman) and I get to demonstrate to him that I can do this and still remain his Mistress, that this act will not cause me to re-consider his position. (of course, I would have to re-consider his position if he were to make any kind of fuss about it). Allowing him to suck the cock of my toy provides him with another opportunity to demonstrate his devotion. There are so many ways I can think of that offer zack such wonderful opportunities to be exactly what his is and demonstrate his great appreciation of me for allowing him to be all that he can be: a total, subservient whore, a slut who will do anything in his power to give pleasure to his Mistress, in turn giving himself great pleasure as well. See what a wonderful Mistress I am?? Of course, introducing various fucking toys into our repertoire (men or women) will offer the variety we all crave in our relationships. The toys will be used to our own purposes.
I proposed this scenario to zack and I do admit, I find it immensely erotic:
zack is bound and hooded spread eagle across the bed. With another woman, we begin to use his body for our pleasure - alternating bringing him to the very edge of orgasm over and over as we suck his cock, ride his face, fuck his ass - and finishing him off as we do all 3 at the same time - me fucking his face and devouring his cock at the same time as she is fucking his ass - I know I will cum when he does and I will order the other to cum as well. Just thinking about it has me so wet i am almost having a spontaneous orgams right here.
Oh, zack... I can not begin to describe the ecstasy we are each going to experience.
Stay tuned for more ideas from my very vivid imagination..
This is a good question and one I have put to myself. My response to it is I can't - I can't consider taking on another slave, at least not at this point (I always say "never say never"). And yet, here I am exploring opportunities to acquire another 'toy" - preferably a very large black one. (just typing that sends a jolt of passion through my body). And not only acquiring one, but requiring zack to watch and listen while I play - knowing full well that it will turn him on, but will also cause him feelings of sadness, jealousy, helplessness.
But here is my rationale - by taking advantage of a 2nd toy (human, of course), I accomplish 2 things: I allow zack opportunities to prove his own devotion and commitment to me by sitting quietly as I fuck another (man or woman) and I get to demonstrate to him that I can do this and still remain his Mistress, that this act will not cause me to re-consider his position. (of course, I would have to re-consider his position if he were to make any kind of fuss about it). Allowing him to suck the cock of my toy provides him with another opportunity to demonstrate his devotion. There are so many ways I can think of that offer zack such wonderful opportunities to be exactly what his is and demonstrate his great appreciation of me for allowing him to be all that he can be: a total, subservient whore, a slut who will do anything in his power to give pleasure to his Mistress, in turn giving himself great pleasure as well. See what a wonderful Mistress I am?? Of course, introducing various fucking toys into our repertoire (men or women) will offer the variety we all crave in our relationships. The toys will be used to our own purposes.
I proposed this scenario to zack and I do admit, I find it immensely erotic:
zack is bound and hooded spread eagle across the bed. With another woman, we begin to use his body for our pleasure - alternating bringing him to the very edge of orgasm over and over as we suck his cock, ride his face, fuck his ass - and finishing him off as we do all 3 at the same time - me fucking his face and devouring his cock at the same time as she is fucking his ass - I know I will cum when he does and I will order the other to cum as well. Just thinking about it has me so wet i am almost having a spontaneous orgams right here.
Oh, zack... I can not begin to describe the ecstasy we are each going to experience.
Stay tuned for more ideas from my very vivid imagination..
Lessons..
I will admit, I have not been a "hard" Mistress for zack. It has taken him some time to come to the full understanding of who he truly is; I see that, although he said the words and went through the motions, he has been in a level of denial about that and I believe that his "non-acceptance": was really the very basis of our difficult year. I also know that if he truly looks inside himself he will see that I am right.
The lessons have been hard - it is not easy for anyone to completely remove the veil of their life and expose who they are inside. Without even realizing it himself zack has spent a lifetime looking for acceptance of employers, family, many women to whom he could trust to accept him if he exposed and displayed his true self, his subservient self.He has always been subservient - even as a young boy - sensitive and willing to sacrifice everything to please others, to forsake his own needs to give others theirs. But in his world men are expected to be powerful, in control, domineering - characteristics zack simply does not possess. He has denied himself everything in his efforts to be whom he truly is - and no one saw, no one knew, know one understood. And because no one in his life accepted him as he was, he denied it himself and pretended to be what he wasn't.
How do I know this? Because I have come to the same realizations about myself. I have always been Dominant, I have always needed control over any situation. And in my life being a Dominant woman has not been an accepted norm. Like children, woman are to be seen and not heard. If I review my own life, I realize that the only times I have been truly happy have been those times when I was able to be in control, but because being a Dominant woman is typically not acceptable, I pushed that "inner Bitch" down to where no one would find her.She is simply not desirable.
Fate brought Zack and I together. It has not been an instant recognition of each other as we are supposed to be, however. We have been together for almost 4 years - the first 2 spent very much in turmoil as we struggled to maintain our facades - not understanding ourselves and trying desperately to be what we each thought the other wanted. What is so funny to me now is that our difficulties occurred whenever zack tried to exert control over me (his public image as a man of power) and when I tried to be the "helpless woman" (my public image - and just typing that now makes me want to puke). both attempts disappointing the other.
After 2 years a single event occurred that triggered a realization in both of us - we were opposite sides of the same coin, but also opposing sides to what society expected of us. I came to the acceptance of who I am much more easily than zack has - I suspect that is the same for many men when they finally begin to see what they have known their whole lives. Our first year in this M/s relationship was one of discovery and freedom - we were like 2 kids in a candy store or a couple on a honeymoon. It was the 2nd year (last year) that the reality and the magnitude of the situation became apparent. I accepted it, zack began to push back. And in the words of Forrest Gump "that's all I'm going to say about that".
Zack has come home to himself, to me. It has taken him a long time to learn to trust me in this, to trust that I know who he is, that I love him regardless, love him unconditionally, that I accepted him totally. And I do. Zack is my life. I will never abandon him, and I will NEVER let him go. he is my slave now and forever.
The lessons have been hard - it is not easy for anyone to completely remove the veil of their life and expose who they are inside. Without even realizing it himself zack has spent a lifetime looking for acceptance of employers, family, many women to whom he could trust to accept him if he exposed and displayed his true self, his subservient self.He has always been subservient - even as a young boy - sensitive and willing to sacrifice everything to please others, to forsake his own needs to give others theirs. But in his world men are expected to be powerful, in control, domineering - characteristics zack simply does not possess. He has denied himself everything in his efforts to be whom he truly is - and no one saw, no one knew, know one understood. And because no one in his life accepted him as he was, he denied it himself and pretended to be what he wasn't.
How do I know this? Because I have come to the same realizations about myself. I have always been Dominant, I have always needed control over any situation. And in my life being a Dominant woman has not been an accepted norm. Like children, woman are to be seen and not heard. If I review my own life, I realize that the only times I have been truly happy have been those times when I was able to be in control, but because being a Dominant woman is typically not acceptable, I pushed that "inner Bitch" down to where no one would find her.She is simply not desirable.
Fate brought Zack and I together. It has not been an instant recognition of each other as we are supposed to be, however. We have been together for almost 4 years - the first 2 spent very much in turmoil as we struggled to maintain our facades - not understanding ourselves and trying desperately to be what we each thought the other wanted. What is so funny to me now is that our difficulties occurred whenever zack tried to exert control over me (his public image as a man of power) and when I tried to be the "helpless woman" (my public image - and just typing that now makes me want to puke). both attempts disappointing the other.
After 2 years a single event occurred that triggered a realization in both of us - we were opposite sides of the same coin, but also opposing sides to what society expected of us. I came to the acceptance of who I am much more easily than zack has - I suspect that is the same for many men when they finally begin to see what they have known their whole lives. Our first year in this M/s relationship was one of discovery and freedom - we were like 2 kids in a candy store or a couple on a honeymoon. It was the 2nd year (last year) that the reality and the magnitude of the situation became apparent. I accepted it, zack began to push back. And in the words of Forrest Gump "that's all I'm going to say about that".
Zack has come home to himself, to me. It has taken him a long time to learn to trust me in this, to trust that I know who he is, that I love him regardless, love him unconditionally, that I accepted him totally. And I do. Zack is my life. I will never abandon him, and I will NEVER let him go. he is my slave now and forever.
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