Still Here... and Still Now...

I'm not sure when I will get back to the reiteration of our journey - not today, anyway. Like a dog with a bone, I am going back to the day before yesterday.


Like most slaves do, Zack has glossed over the parts where he wasn't being the perfect slave. He is not going to be happy that I share that here, but that's life. He is a slave in training, and that training does not always consist of pleasantries. Sometimes that training consists of admonishment - when rebuke is necessary as correction. Public admonishment just might get my point across - simply giving the instruction doesn't seem to work very well.


Admittedly, the visit ended very well, and I shared that yesterday. It actually allowed Zack to save the day. Zack is smart - even when he doesn't think he is. But I'm smart too.


In his post, he said "It was a rough day, and I won't bore you with all the details about how I was feeling".  (Nice try, Zack. You really didn't think you were going to slide that one by your Mistress, did you?)


When we first met, I drove a large SUV that we nicknamed the "Beast". I would pick up Zack in the Beast and we would spend some time together - talking, making out. Last year, I got a new car - I LOVE my car. It's smaller than the Beast, but I figured out this summer that it can actually be quite roomy in the back seat - enough room for me to fuck Zack. The new car was aptly named (by Zack) as the "Fuckmobile". When the Fuckmobile rolls into town, I have the ability to call Zack's ass out - as his Mistress.


But I am reasonable, I am a part time Mistress. Our lives are complicated. Zack has many Masters and i am at the bottom of a long line of people calling the shots for him. These are people he HAS to perform for. These are people more important to his life for a variety of reasons - employer, family and yes, wife. There are times when I simply do not fit, when I am optional in his life. I understand that and I am ok with that. I have choices as well - I do not have to be a part time Mistress. There are other worms out there who would love to be on the receiving end of my crop, or my strap-on.


At this point in my life, I have chosen Zack under these terms. He is a very lucky slave.


And the day in question was one of those times when I was "optional". 


I have given Zack instruction that if I do come to town and he is busy with work or other demands (I know he could be in a meeting, or deeply involved in his work) he is to tell Me. I understand that, I GET THAT.


I had stopped by the day before, had seen him and knew how tired he was. When he got into the car this time, I expected to see his exhaustion and to hear him unwind, to vent even, about the demands made on him, which is exactly what he did. However, it took a bit for it to sink in - it was Me he was venting about, that his angst was as a result of Me stopping by - not only that day, but the day before as well. I was a little taken aback by this. I reminded him again that if he is busy he is to TELL ME, that I expect his honesty about this. I would never be upset, this would not disappoint me because I understand. Zack does not upset Me,   he does confuse Me at times.


His response was that he didn't tell me he was busy, because he wanted to see Me - this right after saying that it is very hard when I call and he "has to drop everything to come out to the car". So, when he got into the fuckmobile, he was conflicted - torn between wanting to see me and staying with his work. Whether he intended it or not, I felt it was My fault he was feeling this conflict. I reminded him that there was no way of Me knowing if he was busy, and that I had instructed him in the past that it was his responsibility to communicate with Me honestly.


I told him to go back to work. I actually wanted to kick his ass out of the fuckmobile right then and there. He didn't want to go; he put his arm around Me, kissed Me and as always happens, I melted. He was very right - I had not planned on fucking him that afternoon. But fuck him, I did. Actually, I FUCKED him.


Looking back, I think the orgasm I experienced that afternoon, there in the backseat of the fuckmobile, was so explosive because it was related to Zack's behavior - it was as if it were his punishment. I was going to have the best orgasm ever - and he was not. I suspect it is going to be some time before he get's that opportunity again - that opportunity to blow his wad inside me, inside my mouth or my pussy.  Oh, I will make sure he gets lots of arousal - I know exactly how to turn him on, but to actually orgasm???? Not on your life. There is work to be done before that happens again.


Oh, and Zack, darling, the next time we get a play session, I assure you, the crop will get a much better workout. You have a lesson to learn. This relationship is about what ***I*** want, not what you want. If I come to town and call you, and you are busy, I don't care if you want to see me regardless. You are to be honest and tell me you are busy. Am I making myself clear???


Trust me, you will be tested again - and probably very soon.